Monday, May 30, 2011

It's a sad time

This post is not about makeup. I had wanted to do this beautiful look inspired from the movie "Burlesque." But this sunday brought me some sad news. My dadi has been in the hospital for about 10 days. She had congestive heart failure and was on a ventilator for a while. On Sunday she passed away peacefully with all her family around her albeit in the hospital.

I had called my family in the US (that's where she is) just to check on her and to see what the situation was and I ended up calling just a few minutes after she had passed. I did not know how to react. After I hung up the phone, I was quiet for a little while and then broke down. I passed the day in a stupor and I kept calling my cousin sister to talk to her and share my feelings and thoughts. My cousin did the same and I felt my burden of grief lighten a little.

Today I woke up feeling with this sense of depression and heaviness in my heart. So I decided to share my feelings here. I want to celebrate her life here.

When people pass away, everyone comes and says good things about them forgetting all the bad things about them. But my grandmother was one of those people whom everyone really loved and respected. She was not mean or cranky. She had the biggest heart and was the favorite aunt/sister/grandma of everyone in my family. She lost her husband when she was in her thirties, went back to school to get trained as a public health officer and brought up 5 children single handedly. She used to work for 12-16 hours a day but never complained. She had so much izzat in her town that no shopkeeper every took money from her or her family for anything.

She suffered from breast cancer but bounced back. She had 2 knee surgeries, 2 open heart surgeries, multiple bouts of bronchitis, chronic kidney disease, installed a pacemaker etc etc. Still she never complained about her illnesses or her issues. Instead she insisted on living life king size. She traveled all over Europe in her 70's, she loved to go shopping and eat out at restaurants. She went on multiple cruises and tripes all over the country side. She even went camping with her family.

She insisted on giving ENORMOUS tips to waiters/waitresses. Once she gave this lady 50$ because she found her so charming! She had a whole set of false teeth and whenever we used to ask her to entertain us by removing them and making funny faces, she happily obliged. She loved to watch "the bold and the beautiful" plus all her Hindi serials. She loved to eat chatt-patta khana. Once my cousins and I had gone out at midnight to eat dinner and when we came back, in her half asleep state, with no dentures she asks "Mere liya kya layee ho?" When we did something wrong, she would lecture us and make us understand why our behavior was not acceptable.

And when ever I got irritated with her for saying something I did not like, she would raise her hands and say "Ok,ok Sorry!" Even though she was so much older she respected even her young grandchildren's feelings and apologized to us.

She used to put on her hat and sit in the sun to enjoy. When she got angry she used to say that she still had the strength in her to set us straight and used to whack the wrongdoer with her cane. That's what I loved about her - her spirit and that is what I raise a tribute to.

I love you very much dadi, and I know you are in a better place. I'm happy that you have moved on. You taught us lots of valuable lessons in life and I hope I can live by at least a few of them.


  1. Very sorry to hear about your loss. Your granny's stories sound like she was a filled with joie de vivre & had a long fulfilling life...well you reminded me of all the great things I have learnt from both my grannies & to be thankful to them... and I think I need to call & meet them more often...I hope & pray that you carry your Dadi's memories & always find strengh, hope & happiness whenever you think of her. God Bless

  2. I'm so sorry for your loss. She must have been a remarkable woman. You've written such beautiful words for your grandmother.
    I lost my maternal grandfather last year after a prolonged illness. And as sad as I was to have lost him, I truly believe that he went to a better place where pain will not touch him.
    Talk to your family, look at photographs & reminisce. All that truly helped me.

  3. Indian Beauty Central - thanks very much for your kind words. Because my dadi was so loved, all the grandchildren ensured that they went to visit her and spend time with her. I myself went last year for 2 months just to be with her. I hope you get to spend precious time with your grannies also.

    Poohkie: thanks girlie.I'm sorry for your loss too. I truly believe that she's gone to a better place too.